WMI WEMT Quotes...

As I sit here sans stitches on my day off trying to earn some CE credits towards my EMT certification, I can't help but reflect back upon the valuable lessons I learned whilst in Yosemite taking my Wilderness EMT class. These are actual quotes from students and instructors in my class courtesy of the fabulous Haley Bercot...



"In emergencies, as in life, you have two choices: spread calm or spread chaos."

"NEVER perform CPR on Frozen people. It could break their frozen little hearts."

"WMI does not recommend peeing on any wounds in any situations."

"Let's say the situation is extreme, hopeless, no help around . . . can we, ya know, cauterize wounds?"

"if you want to survive to the age of 25, be female . . . or surround yourself with females who make good decisions."

"There are two reasons why that patient's treatment would be delayed. First of all, his respiratory rate is under 30, he's got a radial pulse, and he's following verbal commands. Second of all, he's trapped underneath a steel beam and we're not going to be able to get to him any time soon anyway."

"Sometimes you get pregnant ladies who are nice and in good health; other times you get crack hos who didn't even know they were pregnant."
"Is crack ho a mecial term then?"

"9am in the morning after a night of heavy drinking is not the best time to ask for an anal massage."

"Yeah, I think having lots of sex and spending lots of time outdoors counts as self actualization."

"If I ever faint as a result of 'baring down' for a bowel movement, feel free to shoot me."

"oh ha ha that's humerus"

"What type of EMT do you want to be?"