Thoughts and Worries

I think I drank too much beer tonight. No, I'm not drunk. I just have one of those feelings inside that makes you say "ugh." After a short barbecue at a friends house and a brief stint at Kirpatrick's Pub, I decided to head over to The Old Brogue. I remember my dad telling me shortly before he died about going to The Old Brogue back in the 80's when it first opened. Those of you that know me, know that deep down, I'm a pretty somber person. It's that personality trait within me that's attracted to T.O.B. I don't know why. Haha, I find myself relating everything in my life to music. I guess the best way to describe what I go through in a dark, hole-in-the-wall place like T.O.B. is to listen to the song Above Ground by Norah Jones (I did this several times with my old journal: I'd post the lyrics to a song that had particular meaning to myself or the post/mood at hand.). Anyways, the 21st is approaching fast. 3 weeks from Monday to be exact. Boy, do I have a lot to do. Without dropping names or going into details, after tonight, I'm done trying to hang out with the people I want to hang out with before I leave. If someone wants to spend time with me, they know how to get a hold of me. My mother has gotten used to the fact that I'm leaving which is a huge relief for me. To be honest despite our rough past, that was the biggest thing that was worrying me. She has driven me up the wall ever since high school but I love her to death. It's taken me a while and the death of my father to realize that I may have the rest of my life to lead but to her, I am all that she has left. I'm not going to go too in depth with what that truly means because that's one of seldom thoughts that I want to keep private. I have a long journey ahead of me but she will definitely be in my thoughts every step of the way. All in all, my mind is a clutter of thoughts and worries and probably will be for the next couple of weeks....